7 Quick Takes.

Things I'm thankful for edition:

1. I'm thankful for family.  Sure we may not see a lot of them a lot of the times, But I know they are there if we ever need them.  Adam and I (and Miss Lily) are so blessed to have a pretty amazing support system.  I hear people complain about there In-Laws all the time too and I'm so thankful that we don't have issues like that.  I think I speak for both Adam and myself when I say we both have great in-laws. 

2. We have a home and a place to raise our babies.  I know a lot of you hear me complain (ok, more than I should) about how tiny my house is.  But really?  I'm very thankful that we even have a home.  A nice home that is filled with love.  We have a great yard and thankfully  PLENTY of storage.  Sure the walls close in on me sometimes but I know there are a lot of people out there who aren't as fortunate as we are and I don't want people to think I don't appreciate what I do have.

3. My job!  Boy oh boy am I glad to be back at my old job.  Sure I've been back for over a month now, but I still can't help but think how much I like it here better than at the temp job I was working at.  Something really has to be said for coworkers (most of them) that you like and get along with.  I really just fit in here.  Of course I think everyone has things they'd love to change about their jobs but I'd take this one over any other any day of the week (except Friday, I don't work Fridays).

4. Zofran.  That's all I need to say on that one.

5.  I'm thankful for Adam.  I'm lucky that I have found a supportive loving husband who stands by me no matter what.  A partner, someone to laugh with and cry with (ok I do most of the crying)  But the point remains the same, I can be myself with him without having to worry about what he may think. 

6. I'm thankful that we live within our means.  Sure it would be awesome to have more money or be able to afford some of those things on my I want list.  But in reality, we do ok with what we have and I'm happy to not have any outrageous debt to have to contend with.

7. My beautiful Daughter.  She's truly the light of my day.  Her smile and hugs make me melt.  I can't imagine life without her. 

My Baby is 2, Photographic Evidence.

Who needs a recipe?

I think I watch WAY too many cooking shows (shut up Adam) because I no longer follow recipes.  Ok so I've never been a big recipe person to begin with.  My family LOVES cookbooks but even with a pretty massive collection under their belts, they really only use them for baking.  And I've learned that's exactly what I do with mine.  Things you make all the time you learn to tweak to make them to fit your tastes better with time.  Of course watching the food network has really opened up my mind as far as what to make and the basic principals of it all.  For example.  I make stuffed mushrooms.  Adam and Lily and myself all like them.  I've never laid eyes on a recipe for stuffed mushrooms before and yet I make them and 98% of the time they turn out fantastic.  And if they don't turn out great I can usually remember it and fix it the next time.  I do this with other things too, meatloaf, meatballs, crock pot recipes etc.  But in honor of me making the mushrooms for dinner tonight I thought I'd post my method.  Of course ingredients are easily changed out for what's on hand too.

Stuffed Mushrooms

1 container of mushrooms (white button or baby portabellas)  We prefer the small mushrooms but larger is fine too.
Take the stems out and dice them up fine.  In a saute' pan Saute' up some diced onion, garlic in some oil or butter.  Add herbs and spices to taste.  mix in some Seasoned bread crumbs to the consistency of a filling.  Add some cheese (whatever kind if fine, I've used Parm and Mozzarella before)  Put the mushrooms on a baking sheet and fill with filling.  Sprinkle extra cheese on top and bake at about 400 degrees for 15-20 minutes until the cheese is brown and the mushrooms are tender. 

Enjoy!

Other things that would be delicious in these: diced peppers, ground sausage, other veggies diced small. 

These would be great for a party or served with dinner, like a meatloaf.  You can use a lot of the same ingredients in the meatloaf too and it would tie together nice!

Here's the way my brain works these days....

Had my first Dr. appointment yesterday.  Went well, met my Dr. for the first time.  She seems nice.  Uses a lot of big words though which I am totally not used to but I'll manage.  Got to hear the baby's heartbeat which was nice.  She found it right away which was always a struggle with Lily.  She always found the one spot in there that no one could ever find her, as a result we got an extra ultrasound than normal with her so that they could find her.  But not this one.  He/she was right there, bragging about his/her heartbeat.  I'm ok with that.  I also got some more Zofran which seems to be helping a lot with my upset stomach.  Last time they gave me the dissolvable ones and they just didn't seem to work as well.  So now with these I can take have the amount and still feel better.  I'll take it.

Tomorrow I am off work, Happy about it too, I have A LOT that needs to get done including but not limited to: Laundry, Dishes, Vacuuming, grocery shopping, the girl's two year pics.  And a laundry list of other things that I never seem to have the energy or ambition to do.  But alas, I must get it done, no more putting it off til "tomorrow" cause it never seems to get done.

Lily and I are on our own for dinner tonight and I'm just really not sure what to make.  Probably peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with some canned veggie or something.  Simple and doesn't require any dishes to cook with which is a good thing considering the current state of my kitchen.  Seriously though I really should take before and after pics, though I'd be a bit ashamed to actually POST the photos of my messy house.

So I've been watching a lot of "Billy the Exterminator" Despite his horrible fashion choices it's a pretty interesting show.  And of course there was an episode on about someone that had squirrels in their attic......and all the damage they do and whatnot.  Yeah, its just an even more urgent reminder that we need to evict the squirrels that have taken hold of our attic space sooner rather than later.  Sadly it's not easily accessible.  I wonder how much it would cost to have someone to come out and take care of it for us.  I should add that to my list of things to do.  *sigh* and the list just keeps growing.

Here's the truth.

The truth is this:




1. I feel like shit.

2. I feel bad that I keep complaining about it and I’m sure I’m alienating those people closest to me.

3. I do not feel like a good wife.

4. I do not feel like a good mother right now. My patience is so worn thin that the stupidest things make me mad and frustrated.

5. I feel frustrated that I can’t seem to get any relief no matter what I try.

6. I feel alone. I do know that I’m not alone and I have lots of people there that love me and want to help but I can’t help but feel SO SO alone like no one understands what I’m going through right now, even though I know that thought process is stupid and there are people that understand or at least TRY to understand what’s going on.

7. I do feel blessed that we are having another baby, but don’t be surprised if I don’t let it show til I start feeling better. My nerves and emotions are all out of wack right now and I’ve lost sight of some of my priorities. I hope to be back to myself soon.

8. I’m not sure I want more kids. I LOVE having kids and being a mom and idealing I’d love to have some more kids after this one, but I just don’t know if I could do this all again. Not just to myself but to my family.

9. I was so looking forward to this summer. Lily is at such a fun age right now and she is learning stuff like crazy and I was so looking forward to taking her places and doing things with her and now these days all I want to do is lay in bed and cry and feel sorry for myself.

10. Life doesn’t seem fair. I know my suffering will be WELL worth it once this baby gets here, but like I said, it’s hard to keep sight of that when you feel like poo 24/7.

11. I want someone to hug me and tell me I’m doing great and that I’m doing an awesome job and they couldn’t do it as well as me and that our baby is going to be so amazing and this won’t last forever.

12. I try to reach out to people but do it in all the wrong ways.

13. I need to learn to communicate my frustration and ask for what I need without crying every. single. time.



There, that's the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

A post in pictures

The girl swimming in her pool after her birthday party.

Enjoying some of her birthday presents

No party is complete without Elmo cake.

The birthday girl with her cake.

Just having fun in her pool